I am so sorry that I have had so much political commentary on this blog lately but when it is so ripe, you just gotta pluck it. If you have never seen this video it is a riot. Sarah Palin and her pastor, he is praying for her to be protected from witches. It is super ridiculous. Call Buffy, Call Macbeth, call Ulleses. There are witches about you best be careful or they will hug your trees and say "blessed be", to your neighbors. So funny.
I bet you know that I hate stupid people. Hell, that sentence was enough to give it away. Sadly, idiots abound on this planet in herds far greater than even the once mighty North American Bison. Unlike our friend the Bison, however, there are no tribesmen gathering together on horseback and forcing idiots off of cliffs in droves. That saddens me further.
As you all have guessed, our country is in the midst of an election for President and this is were the story I am trying to get to comes from. You see, the Republicans nominee for Vice President is a woman named Sarah Palin. She has very little credentials as a candidate, which doesn't bother me too much, credentials, cresmentials as I see it, a person with very few credentials can, sometimes, do the job better than someone who has been doing it for too long and has lost their edge. To clarify, from a personal side of this, I do not like Sarah Palin, I have not met her but I have known enough needy, manipulative, high maintenance women in my life to be able to identify one once I get a sight line on her and I would bet bottom dollar that she is one. Being a dformer beauty pagent contestant doesn't help in this area either. But I digress, I am off track, so back to the story. It goes like this.
I am in line at Cub foods, waiting to make a purchase. There are two middle aged women in front of me, also waiting in line. They are discussing politics. One of them said this.
You must imagine this in the voice it was used, Minnesotan, nasal talk, almost like Fargo but not as over exagerated. Actually, come to think of it, they sounded like Sarah Palin.
" Oh, I tell you, I like that Sarah Palin, she is very well dressed and just sharp as a tack. She doesn't even get angry at all the sexist remarks from that other guy."
To which the other replied.
" Yah I like her too You know that she raised five kids and one of them has mental problems. If you can raise a family that size being the Vice President would be easy. She's got my vote fer sure."
Ladies and gents, as much as I'd like this to be a joke, it is not. I heard it, right there, in the check out line under the eyes of Britney, Angelina, Oprah and Nostredamus. As I pondered the irony of beating these women with a rolled up Oprah magazine, I realized that these were the voters I had been hearing about so much recently. The dumb vote, the idiot vote, the imbecile vote, call it what you will. it is the vote that comes from that portion of our society that wants its voice heard but that is the voice that calls out for the most retarded crap.
I kid you not, that is a real conversation and those were real, uninformed voters. Hell, if that was what it took to be Vice President my mom should have been elected some time ago. She not only raised six children and one of them was me, a child that could considered the "unbreakable" sticker on a Tonka truck to be a personal taunt and challenge from the good people at the Mound Metalcraft Company. The woman should get a medal for that and a cabinet post to boot.
There is a reason I don't go out and mingle that much anymore. I tend to stay at home a lot, watch Survivorman and think about how nice it must be to live like Les Stroud does for seven days. No one around but himself and the opportunity for a lonely yet, highly youtubeable death at the hands of an angry marmosset. It must be so nice to just get away and not hear idiots talk for a few days. That is why my vote will go to the first candidate that comes up with an airtight plan to make it a criminal act for stupid people to breed.
Viva Castration! Bye.
If you ever read this site you probably know I have a lot of problems with hypocrisy and stupidity. The greatest examples of these problems tend to come from the governmental and religious sectors of our planet. So many things about those areas irk me. Things like electing public officials because of their strong religious leanings, even though we are supposed to separate church and state in this country. Having pious people, who believe that scientific advancement is a tool of the devil, in charge of our military arsenal. What has recently began to chap my cheeks recently is this. A majority of our elected officials in D.C. are members of the United Methodist Church. Many of these same people are investors in large oil and power concerns. United Methodists are, for the most part, Short Earthers, who tend to not believe in dinosaurs or a billion year old planet. Now, this is a wishy washy argument but some believe that dinosaur bones are a trick from the devil to test man kinds faith, others believe they are there as a trick from God to test man kinds faith, either way it's a dick move on both parts. But do you see the problem here? Oil comes from millions of years of decomposition of organic material. Several of the coal and oil men have made billions from this organic material. That's right, billions of dollars off of a geological event that they don't even believe occurred. Damn that pisses me off. Using the devils/ Gods test to make billions, isn't that some kind of sin. I am no bible scholar but I would expect that to not sit right on some side of the heaven vs. Hell hierarchy. Do you think they even thought this through? "Hey Bobby Jean, the Earth is spewing forth some useful, yet sinful dark liquid. Shall I seek the path of righteousness and cover the sin hole? Ah screw it let's get rich for a while and see if we can buy our way into Heaven." That is what I figure was the first pious Pete conversation about oil. Conveniently, for old Pete, in most major religions, you can now tithe, IE., buy your way into Heaven. So I guess that worked out for some of them. The rich ones. If you own an oil company you can sin way more than if you just work in a rig, then you can only afford to be a little sinny. Okay, this is a rant but I think you get the idea. If you do not believe that the Earth is absolutely ancient but you use any oil based product, you are using something that, in your mind, does not exist. If this is a religious belief, then, on some level, you are a sinner and a hypocrite. Sinners I am used to and friends with, hypocrites are another story and I hate them and do not care if they are ground into organic matter, left to rot for a million years and used to heat my house, screw 'em.
In my research fo rthis rant, I found this quote from a Pastor Bob Weeks, of the New Creation United Methodist Church. He was asked:" Why can't we, as Christians believe in Dinosaurs?
His answer: " About dinosaurs. Many Christians DO believe dinosaurs once inhabited the earth. I personally believe that science has done more to make my faith stronger, especially as we look out into an incredible, complex universe that gives evidence of a master designer. I believe it takes more faith to not believe in God when we see the amazing creation around us"
Pretty week answer there Weeks. In fact, that is down right crap and has nothing to do with dinosaurs or anything really.
This is why I avoid the South.
I am sorry , dear readers, to bring up the RNC again but it's really on my tits and driving me batty. Our current government irritates me to a level of here to fore, unimaginable chaffing. Not the dish type of chaffing but the, rubbing wet skin against other wet skin kind of chaffing. When I heard that upwards of six thousand police and security would be on hand for the RNC in St. Paul this year, two things went through my head. The first was the song "Police State' by Agnostic Front and the second was "Wow, this is gonna be ugly and stupid". Now, on the second day of the convention, I realize that I am right. It is bad, stupid and very, very, police statey. Amy Goodman was arrested for "interfering with a peace officer" . If you do not know of Amy Goodman, she is a writer and investigative journalist and former news director of Pacifica Radio in New York. She was arrested in St. Paul while still wearing her press passes to the RNC and, word has it, treated rather physically by the fuzz. That is a very sad part of the story, partially because, even though the press pisses me off on a regular basis, their freedom is part of our constitution and also, even though she has been through a lot of turmoil in her reporting career I am sure, I could probably tear Amy Goodman apart like a wookie that lost at space chess. She is not an imposing mountain of angry bull dyke after fourteen years on a prison barge with no company other than fat, flatulent man mounds. She is a fifty one year old journalist that hapens not to agree with the sixth reich of Reaganism that is currently in power. I just wanted to rant, because, as a writer of things that bug me, i wish to keep the freedom to write about them sacred
. Here let me leave you with a Bush quote, I believe it was March 22nd 2006
" I mean, the minute we start trying to suppress our press, we look like the Taliban."
Hey, I know who you are gonna be for Halloween, Osama Bin Login' . Sorry, that's a Northern Minnesota joke.
Did I ever tell you guys how much I hate stupid people?
Good night and good luck.
