brain Freeze. A short story of loss.

It was 9 AM on Tuesday when I found Carols letter. "Dear Brian", it began," I'm so sorry, I can no longer live this way. I never meant to hurt you like this but, I have met someone else. It has been going on for a couple weeks and I could no longer live the lie. My heart aches so much as I write this letter. I am truly sorry it had to come to this. Love Carol. PS. Don't try to look for me, my cell is disconnected and I will be living far, far away."
I am not sure why I couldn't just accept it, truth be known things haven't been that good between us for quite some time now and I was thinking about ending it myself. I guess it's just different when you are the dumpee and not the dumper. So I got on the phone and started making calls. First to Carols cell, sure enough, disconnected. Next, I called her aunt Nell, they had been growing apart lately but I figured with this new development at least she might have told Nell where she would be going. If Nell knew anything, she wasn't telling me but she didn't seem surprised or that upset, infact she said she expected this for a while and explained how Carol did the same kind of things for most of her young life, attaching herself to men, using them and then running away. Carols parents were next on the list, they told me the same story, even tried to apologize for their daughters actions. "It's not your fault", I told them, " I was just gullible and in love, well let me know if you hear anything". Friends, co-workers, everyone I spoke to ended up telling me the same stories. Carol was a user, she would make you fall in love with her then rip out your heart. The signs were there for me to see them, I guess I just didn't want to. Love is blind, deaf, dumb and stupid, being in love is like being Helen Keller overdosed on codeine. By the end of the day I was emotionally and physically exhausted, plus I was on the phone most of the afternoon and had forgotten to eat. Nothing in the kitchen fridge but I was pretty sure I had some ice cream in the basement coffin freezer. Ah yes, there it was one pint of Cherry Garcia, a little bit of blood frozen to the outside but I don't think it soaked through. I pondered the irony of the name "coffin freezer" as a stared into Carols lifeless, ice covered eyes, I couldn't see the face of the man being that his neck was twisted completely backward. It's amazing the strength you can summon when you are hurt and enraged. Oh well, I need to eat and get some rest, I have a long day ahead of me tomorrow gonna take a trip up to Carols family cabin and see if she shacked up with her man there, gotta remember to bring a candle and a wrench, I think they turn the gas off in the fall when they aren't using it.