Sitcoms from another reality.

The other day I was thinking thoughts of a thoughtful nature. These thinkings dealt with the possibility of there being alternate realities. You have seen so many shows with them, like the StarTrek where being evil is somehow connected to having a goatee, which, for the record, I have. n another reality, you could be a different person. Maybe you would even be a different sex. Maybe a monkey, the possibilities are literally, endless. However, as usual, my thoughts began to stray towards television. I was pondering what TV would be like in the other realm. That is why I will now give you my ideas of what some hit sitcoms would be like in another reality.

In the late 80's there was a great grand stinker of a sitcom called "Full House". It was one of those wholesome, family shows that old people liked and non-free thinking youth enjoyed basically, the same fat masses that made Bush President and sent money to Falwell. It was a sugar coated lump of burning shit from hell, that made Bob Saggett a household name and Dave Colliet rich, him and his stupid impersonations, god he sucked. Well enough ranting, here is my vision for "Full House" from another reality. I will try to write this TV Guide style.

Full House, ABC, 7:30 EST... Tonight hilarity ensues when uncle Jessy is visited by the leader of the Children of God cult who teaches him that a game of patty cake with the girls can be, not just fun but erotic to boot. Won't Danny be mad when he finds out what has been going on behind the rockers closed doors? Then tragedy strikes when Joey, after years of struggling with obscurity, accidentally suffocates while masturbating in his closet with a plastic bag and a length of underwear elastic... Don't miss it.

The Cosby Show, NBC, 8:00 EST ... On a ground breaking Cosby we learn about an important bond between a man and his son when, after taking the family car without asking, Theo is repeatedly beaten about the face and neck by Cliff with a giant plastic pudding pop. The laughs just keep coming when Clair returns home for more of her personal belongings that she forgot after the divorce. Looks like Theo fell down the same stairs she used to huh Cliff?

All in the Family, CBS, 7:00 ... Archie wife swapping? With what couple? Could it be the Jefferson's? Tune in Thursday and find out.

I think that should do it, you can imagine that I am coming up with far worse stuff that I just can't seem to properly put to words. At any rate I just wanted to share that with you and let anyone that is reading this know. If you happen to be getting television channels from a parallel dimension, please let me know about it. Oh and the 700 Club is not from another dimension, sadly those idiots are from this reality only they choose not to live in it. Eat me Pat Robertson!