Friday, March 30, 2007

Bully for you.

I am again, annoyed, within seconds of awakening from my brief journey into the world of slumber, I am jolted awake by my television, which I use also as an alarm clock. This morning, much like many of them, starts out with my vision settling on the worlds news, if you can call it that. You have stories about british navy in Iran and the severe storms in the mid-west but then they really hit me. They had a report about some cities that have put stiffer penalties into their anti-bullying laws. Laws? yes laws that make bullying a crime. Yes, I am now positive that Chuck Darwin is rotating in his grave so furiously that he may just drill his way to New Zealand. Kids need bullying, you can't outlaw it. The bully is a necessity in your childhood developement. The evolution into adulthood is not easy and not supposed to be easy. Surviving the Tyranasaurus Rex of the playground, proved that you had the survival abilities to go on to another, higher and more aggressive, grade. I was bullied when I was a kid, I was bullied alot. I was a blond, blue eyed, chubby cheeked fatty, the perfect target for a good bullying. Every day I would get on the bus and get some kind of verbal or physical rebuke. I clearly remember the threats of a kid named Billy, he would torment everyone who was smaller than him and since this child was the size of a small lakeside cabin and about as intelligent as one, if said cabin had a severe learning disability, he would just torment everyone. I seriously, lived in fear of this kid for years, terrified that he was going to pummel me next and, even when I did get beaten, I then set to worrying when I was gonna get beaten again. Billy wasn't the only one, I was not a well liked child, plump, as I have stated but I had the double whammy of being smart as well, this put me on a bullying waiting list and as the good grades stacked up, so did the beatings. I know what I am talking about when it comes to being bullied, so I can attest to the fact that it is good for kids, it helps them. Fast forward from my childhood and I can say that a couple of years later, Billy was still trying to bully kids but he didn't seem so big anymore. By the time I was in my early teens my growth spurts had come on fully and Billy was still the same size he was in grade school, sure he got bigger eventually and he never stopped trying to be a bully but he just wasn't scary anymore and I got tougher and wasn't afraid to fight by then and niether were my friends, so Billy decided it best to just leave us alone. The story of BIlly is true, I have not seen him in years, the last time I did he was picking on some kids, way younger than him. The thing people don't get is that, for people like Billy, bullying is in their genetic code, you can niether, teach nor beat it out of them, it is who they are. Think back to the kid who was the biggest bully in your school and you will notice that they are as recognizable as a kid with downs syndrome. The bully always has that wide low brow, perfect for inflicting and taking damage. Their hands and shoulders are always abnormal sizes for grade school kids. A gap is common between their incissors. Of course they have the strange ability to grow facial hair well before anyone else in their class. Last of all they are slow, almost as if they are cold blooded. These kids should not be punished because your kid is a wussy, they are simply fulfilling their genetic programming. If you don't want your kids to be bullied, just make sure they stay away from the dangerously large child who looks like a caveman. Personally I would think you would rather let your kid grow up not to be a little mary, that is just my opinion though.

1 comment:

Xymyl said...

I got beat up a lot, but I never considered it "bullying", and taking a beating is such a useful skill in life that once I had mastered it, I never considered any type of strength training to defend myself. Besides the only real differences between me and other kids was that they were stupid. I couldn't fight a stupid kid. I could have fought back but I was really afraid that I would accidentally kill them. I would however, goad them into beating on me so long that they finally gave up and as I stood (yes, stood) there bleeding and barely able to breathe, I would summon the energy to say the traditional, "didn't hurt", or something similar.

I knew enough not to taunt the kids who used their entire protein intake on muscle development, because they are like lobotomized animals. I even avoid those kids today. They will cut out your heart, lick it clean, and bring it to show-and-tell, then they will cry when the homocide detectives don't give them an A.