And another question answered.

Jeremy from Minneapolis has asked about techniqus that may be useful in the bedding of a "nice, christian girl". Well Jeremy, first of all, if you are looking for a nice, conservative, god fearing, tongue speaking, ugly flowery dress wearing, Sunday driving, two kids and a minivan, christian girl, you probably want to go the evangelical route. This play involves, being very moral, at least in public, go to church weekly, slowly integrate yourself into the churches trust system, this can take months if not years. After a long while you will meet an angry woman who has turned to religion to fill the void left by her dead/cheating ex-husband. Try to befriend this woman and her children, eventually she will agree to go on a date with you and a chaperone, of course. Many long months later you will find yourself married to this woman and you will, undoubtedly find yourself in one or two, overly warm, sticky and unattractive situations with the woman you now call, One who ruined my life. A much more appealing off shoot of this play is to go through all the primary steps of the love building process but, when you go on the date with the chaperone present, drug the good christian girl and go get nasty with the chaperone, who is always a more attractive and adventerous woman than her frumpy counter part. Top off the night by leaving the frumpy one in the car with a picture of your testicles pinned to her chest. This play isn't for everyone but I am a romantic, so I prefer it. I think, however, that the nice christian girls Jeremy is asking about are the ones we all think he is talking about. The way too hot to be in a church kinda girl. The one with the bedroom eyes and the strip club legs. Yeah, she is in a house of the lord but she looks so out of place, like the world is warped around her. As if it is a sin against the almighty for her to even consider parking that perfect posterior in one of these pious pews. Dark eyes, ruby red lips, a Tootsie pop that is always circling her mouth but never seems to wear down to the soft candy center, ask Mr. Owl and he will tell you, she is a bad, bad, naughty girl. So Jeremy, you wanna know how to seduce this vixen of the venerated, well, it is easy, she is what we in the industry call, a church slut. First, try talking to her, ask her what she thought about the sermon. When she rolls her eyes and gives you a look like 'Ick, what a dweeb', tell her your glad she isn't a crazy bible thumper and tell her you want to get out of there and get a drink, the prospect of a free drink will get her moving and you should be in from that point on but really it doesn't matter what you do, after all, she is a whore. I find that meeting nice, rich, christian girls is always good fun, you don't need to wear a suit, infact, make sure you don't, especially at an big function. Remember, the more her dad snears at you, the more she wants you. If you talk to her dad, try telling him things that are very contrary to the things he likes and believes, that one always works great. My last piece of advice though Jeremy, is this, to get any woman, christian or non, all you have to do is follow these simple steps. 1) Act indifferent to them when you meet them, this will annoy them and they will have to talk to you because they hate being ignored. That is it, that is all you need to know, if you pay attention to them, they know they can have you and they will go away, if you ignore them they will do anything to get you to pay some attention to them and I do mean anything. I hope this helps you Jeremy, good day and good lovin'.