Cool Billy street preacher

Okay I keep running into these petty annoyances on the streets of San Diego and they have really begun to overwelm me so I will write about them. I have seen many types of street preachers in my life, everything from the kindly, old bible jocky on the corner who simply wants to have a discord about beliefs, to the raging lunatic on a building ledge holding an ancient, and worn King James bible in his hand while he yells to pedestrians about the virtues of a vegan diet (really). Now, however, I am seeing a horrible thing on the streets of my beloved, adopted city. I am seeing a sickening increase in young street preachers. These are the guys and gals who walk about our cities and try to save our immortal souls from the grips of evil but unlike decent street preacher and doorway evangelists, they do not have the decency to give you the proper warning signs of a possible theological discussion, IE, holding a bible, wearing a tie or a bicycle helmet (bicycle helmet laws, by the way, I believe are funded by the Mormons as a way for them to blend into the normal daily traffic of a city and my belief will be noted when a country wide uproar for cyclists to wear white short sleaved shirts and black ties is put into motion) or simply asking you if you're interested in talking biblical for a bit. No, these little imps try to blend in to our scenery and catch you off gaurd, they wear "urban" clothing and try to talk in a language that they have, apparently, been told is "street" talk. They can usually fool the unsuspecting long enough to get close, that is when they strike. Usually by using old cocaine logic phrases like,"hey man I party too", or, "bro I have been were you are". they have the idea that they can act cool enough to get under your radar and win you over to their way of thinking. The sad fact is that, if you speak to them long enough, you will find that A) they really have no decent idea what they are talking about and B) their knowledge of the bible is soarly lacking. They go blindfolded and unarmed into a battle of wits that they can not win against people with even the most rudimentry biblical knowledge and when faced with these facts, they tend to become upset and violent. I am no expert in holy writ, that is just not my way but compaired to them I hold the equivelent of a masters degree in theology. After a brief discord with one such fellow, after I explained to him the theory of the blood sacrifice and the cleansing of original sin, which he was not, I geuss, updated on, I was told,"if I wasn't a christian, I would smash your sinner head with a brick", all I could do was giggle and explain to him that my knowledge of bone breaking far exceded my scriptual insight. The best part of these boulevard bible thumpers, is that they seem now, to be employing young women, clad in very provocitive garb, that will flirt with you and then try to save you. Recently, two young women, their breasts slammed together in a way that would make even the most devout monk, wish for a place to hold his pen, tried to tell me that the real pleasures of the flesh, could only be gained through god. That is the equivelent of teasing a ten year heroin junkie with a pound of pure china white and then trying to sell him a loaf of sourdough bread instead. Religion is a good thing for people who want it, it can make even the most savage human being into a good person but it is not cool, it is not sexy and it is above all, not something to be "wrapped" about. Beliefs are not cigarets, there may be a flavour country of the faithful but the Marlboro man is not riding horseback in it.