Pardon me if I offend: Part 1, The Comforting

This week I have decided to pick five subjects that just irk me and give my take on them. These are subjects that show the odd de-evolution of man, even though they are in the guise of social evolution and here goes.

"So I wake to see, and lo, the comforting has come to pass"! (From, Joe Bjorklunds, The Bible as written by 2000 monkeys). The inhabitants of this small, watery rock known as Earth are going completely insane. We live in a retail society, a nation of GAP kids in pastels and denim, soccer moms in SUVs, metrosexuals flouncing about in high end clothing shops, displaying their credit cards as proudly as a drunk frat boy displays his penis on a street corner during Mardi Gras. We are in a dire place in our social evolution, something is amiss in our world. I am a wonderer of sorts, a kind of modern day nomad, one of those strange people who can not stand the status quo and can't seem to stay in the same place for a whole year. My life, I find, is so much more pleasurable when something bizarre and unusual happens to me, that I will wander, aimlessly for hours on end just hoping to find some sort of anomalism that I can stare at, poke with a stick, mabye even eat. Greasy spoon restaraunts, with large sweaty women working behind the counter who call you "hun", and offer you apple pie with american cheese on top, where, if you are brave enough to try it, you can eat the scrumptious yet unrecognizible house specialty. Places like this have all but died out, replaced instead by TGI Fatdays, Bennigans and all the other boring places our society provides us to dine. These large corporate restaraunts spend millions of dollars to make you feel comfortable, not just in the dining industry either but all of the large corporations, food, clothing, even books and movies. Millions spent yearly on making you feel welcome, cozy and above all, familiar. Apparently these enviornments make people relaxed and content and that makes them keep coming back, the atmosphere, not the food, The logo prestige, not the actual comfort of the clothes. This is the basis of the comforting, this is a terrifying outlook for our future and for the sake of saying it, here is my perspective. As far as fashion, stop dressing the same, I work the door at a local pub every weekend, in a very busy part of town, I get to watch all the club boys and club girls walk by all night. You all look the same, please take notice of this, at some point shouldn't all the little paris's and britneys realize they all showed up at the party in the same outfit? Mabye we could hope that exact thing happens one day and all the mimicks beat each other to death with their stupid little yip dogs, yeah that would be hot (ironic mockery). Not long ago I worked for a large home improvement company and would regularly have customers ask me where things were. I would tell them and eight times out of ten they would complain to me that all the stores had different set ups and how, it should be the same all over so people can find things easier. It was part of my job to listen to these unfathomable idiots but oh, the things I wanted to say, the numerous things they could heat up and penetrate various body cavities with. I hate these people, these cravin, horrible, little, have to be comfortable all the time people, no imagination, no curiosity, no urge to poke strange objects with sticks. Our society may be civilized, but in no way are we evolving, comfort and large corporations are turning us into a world of scared, fat, poorly educated shopping drones. America is the worst, so far but other countries are catchng up. Our global economy means this horrible sameness will soon plague our entire planet, nothing will be new any more, nothing will be suprising, people will be content as cattle and just as easy to control. At that point we will be de-evolved past, even the first stone age. A bunch of Neandrathals, only no hunting or foraging abilities and not even able to make a fire because Pier 1 doesn't sell a flint and tinder set. People will tell you that curiosity killed the cat and the media uses horror movies to make you think you shouldn't poke things with sticks(see The Blob,1958, independent film release) but the fact is stupidity killed the cat, I can be curious about a warm car engine but that doesn't mean I am gonna sleep on it and if you have a stick to poke something with, you have a stick to hit something with. Later you can use said stick, to start a fire and then you have a fire to cook the thing you beat to death with the stick with, I should eat before I write by the way. My point is this, large corporations want you to be comfortable because that way you will be content, so you will not get bored. boredom leads to curiosity, which leads to investigation, which leads to discovery, which leads to experience and all this turns you from a mindless shopping drone, to a well rounded, free thinking human being, with a nice firm rump as well, there are many hills and stairwells in the discovery world, good for the gluets. So please for the sake of humanity, avoid those massive chain stores and restaraunts if you can, go to a mom and pop restaraunt, buy your clothes in Tijuana, go to the less expensive strip club around the corner, sure the girls are a little dumpy but they gotta support their kids somehow, what with their baby daddy up and runnin' off like that and most importantly, you are keeping the big corporations away from your hard earned cash. All you can do is try, I can say, I am not perfect, either, being a Starbucks junkie but I try, god how I try. A mocha does sound good right now though.