Bjorklund/Rice in 2008!

This is not todays blog, that will come after the drinking stops making my eye demons burn me. This is a bid for the presidency, that's right, all it took was a comment from Jeremy in St. Louis Park again and he has set the whole thing in motion. The presidency, why not? I know some of my readers know me and many of them what knows me, know my long time friend Marty Rice. Marty and I go way back, about twenty years back actually. I still remember the day we met, which is funny because after that everything became a blur for a few years. Drugs, drinking, petty larceny, grand theft cantalope, there really was no crime too big or to small for us while we matured into manhood. I remember the old high school days, at least the ones I wasn't bombed off my ass on Jim Beam for, oh the fun we had, I think. There was no problem too difficult for Marty and I, if we wanted something, we took it, if we couldn't take it, we beat up someone who had it and took theirs. Ah, the innocents of youth, the boundless joy one gets as you remember, growing up. So much in common, we made fast friends, both of us were farm boys, both of us were twisted, mentally and physically, beyond the reach of any psychologist by many older siblings. There was of course, the voice of reason in our lives, we called him Mike. Mike would was always responsible and upright, very fair and just, also very studious, often he would say to us, "why don't you guys just knuckle down, go to class and do your work"? to which we would respond, "all that beer isn't going to drink itself and what about those buildings that haven't been burnt yet? No, no, no, we have matters to attend to that do not involve algebra". I am being nostalgic and getting away from my point, which is this... America you need us, Marty and I would be great presidents and vice-presidents, not only because we wouldn't be too sure who was pres and who was vice, which would eliminate all kinds of rediculous barriers and power struggles but because we are two, thirty something thugs from a small mining town in northern Minnesota, who enjoy nothing more than a full pint of lager, some bagpipes and a good kick in the face. That is what America needs right now, government who stands on the issues and sometimes, smacks the issues around if they get testy. I mean really, Reagan was senile, old Bush was semi-retarded, Clinton put a cigar up a womans trunk in the oval office, young Bush is about as smart as a lobotimized monkey with a cocain addiction, which is ironic if you think about it, the way I see it, America, you need us. Two wide eyed, half crazed, possibly psychotic, madmen, with no qualms about fighting tooth and nail for our rights, really we would beat up congress for you people, and in war time we would be the first ones to get the other guys drunk so they wouldn't show up the next day. You see, sensible solutions for a better tomorrow, Bjorklund/Rice in 2008. We are almost as manly as Hillary.